I’ve been divorced twice and I live in my second (ex) wife’s basement, so I can be around for my 8-year-old son. It’s a weird situation but he needs his dad and I need my son.
On the road it’s a whole different dysfunction, the Killers of Comedy are my family away from home.
I travel with Sal Governale who doesn’t exactly have the best home life now because of all the crazy fucking things he does on Sirius Radio; including kissing his writing partner’s taint on-air for 500 bucks. I guess any wife would be appalled.
I also run around with Beetlejuice; a black, retarded midget who thinks he’s in charge of the crew. Sometimes, when Beetlejuice finds the booze, he’ll scream at us until he shits his pants. Once, my old girlfriend picked us up at the airport and as we got in the car she asked what’s that smell, which one of you shit yourself? I broke up with her shortly after.
Can’t forget Richard Christy; who only showers once a week. It’s like packing your luggage full of shit and taking it on a plane. He’s is afraid to fly so he starts drinking 2 hours before boarding and keeps it up the whole flight. You can spot his empty beer cans rolling down the aisles on take off and landing.
Speaking of dirty, there’s Yucko the Clown who hasn’t washed his clown outfit in 7 years. He travels with dildos in his luggage and it’s funny to see Security handling vibrators while searching his luggage; “It’s my act, I’m a clown damn it!”
Jim Florentine also comes with us. I’ve known him for 17 years and he still acts like a little kid. Anytime a women walks within 10 feet he says, “Ma’am, you dropped something” and she looks around as he giggles like a little Asian school girl. He also has the worst farts I’ve ever smelled. He would fart in his car, roll the windows up and put the heat on. Torture. Like Abu Grab but nobody’s genitals are being touched.
Ex-professional wrestler The Iron Sheik - 65, broke and recovering from a crack problem - is making his comeback with us. Airport security love to frisk him every flight, sometimes we tape it and play it on Howard TV. They must think he’s got bombs in those curly Aladdin shoes of his.
Finally there’s Shuli, who works for Howard 100 News. The man smokes more weed than anyone I’ve ever met. When we stay in hotels I don’t even need to know his room number, I follow the smell of pot.
When we’re not on the road I’m on the radio. Most people know me from Howard Stern, I do work for the Kidd Chris Show in Philly, too. They’re a bunch of ball busters who would throw their mothers out of a window if it made for good radio but you gotta respect that. That’s why it’s so successful; it’s fast paced and hard hitting. I do believe the Kidd Chris Show is the future of radio.
Another good friend and big radio talent is Scott Ferrell, he does a sports show on Howard 101 from 8-12 Mon - Fri. His show is like nothing you have ever heard and to watch him is like watching a caged animal let out of a cage on speed. He and his wife just had a baby girl and I’m really happy for them.
I have a show on Sirius Radio myself (Howard 101 - Sundays at 7pm est), Miserable Men with Shuli and Jim Florentine. It’s just a little slice of heaven where us men finally get to tell women how we really feel about them and what they do to us. Pay back is a bitch, ladies.
For more on Miserable Men or the Killers of Comedy visit my site. I try to keep it pretty well updated but things are always so crazy. Last week’s tour made me snap and I finally quit drinking. Now, I’m on Lexapro and Xanax and I can last for hours in bed. Thank god for my lifetime subscription to HotMovies.com so I never have to get up.
-The Reverend Bob Levy
You can get more of the Rev Bob every Sunday night at 7:00 pm on his radio show Miserable Men, Sirius Satellite Radio - Howard 101.
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